Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Bachelor Recap- Brad, I'm Sorry.

Hello from the desert! Okay, I normally am in the desert, but this time I AM in the desert. Like somewhere between PHX, and Indio. Those who live in PHX know it well because it is a huge stretch of land with nothin' to look at for miles, and miles, and I have lots of fond memories of this road from when I was traveling it with a 2 month old who blew out her diaper right as I ran out of gas. PS- I was by myself with that 2 month old and 3 other kids. It was a good time.

Anyway! Isn't technology so cool? My hubby has wi-fi anywhere your cell phone works. I am blogging, and he is listening to talk radio (ew) and we are on our way to Cali while some old people watch our kids. (LOVE THOSE OLD PEOPLE! )

I aaaaaaaaaaalllllllllmost didn't write my bachelor re-cap, but I decided that I needed to keep up with my commitment to society by writing my blog posts. :) Ya, I know all 12 of you who read my blog for these updates. This is how much I love you.

So, let's start with the title, shall we? Brad. I am sorry. I misjudged you. Actually, I didn't misjudge you. I was right, you were a total commitment phobe. But with your dedicated therapy sessions, you have decided to not be such an un-emotional troll. YAY YOU! I am seriously proud of you bud. And your therapists. I have been thinking lately that I need one of those, and with the progress they made with you, I think I might be signing up soon .

Okay, now that that is off my chest, let's move on with the dates. Ashley. Sweet girl huh? Cute story about the Seal song, but seriously, these producers this season are out for some blood. I mean, do you really thing that was just a coincidence? Seriously? No, it wasn't. They wanted an emotional tear fest, and they got one. I am sure at one point in one interview at some time they said, "What is the most meaningful song to you, and why" and BAM. They have their first date with Ashley. And then making Emily get on a small private JET??? Wow. Seriously. Way to make a girl have a nervous break down.

I really liked Ashley, she was super cute, actually is anyone else surprised by the girls this season? I mean, all of the dates so far have been so NORMAL. I mean, they seem like really nice girls! (Except Michelle, Puh-lease. . . no one can like her, not even her own mother. Oh, that was mean, sorry.) My sister said how excited she was to watch Michelle's crazy. Especially with the fireworks over the head hand move, which she did several times BEFORE the kiss, and then afterword? No fireworks. Did anyone else notice this? Weird. She didn't even say that there WERE fireworks when they kissed, so, I guess we know where Michelle rates.

We all LUHUV Emily, right? But did anyone else think . . . . BORING. . . on their date? I mean, she is like the Brad of Bachelor past. An un-emotional troll. (Very very cute and sweet troll) But, unless she was talking about Rickybobby, she was all straight faced, and not so fun. I don't think she is ready for all of this. Not by a long shot. And, even though your fiance died, and you have a child with him, don't you think it is relationship napalm to mention how fantastic your ex was and how amazing he is? I mean, no one is ever going to think they can stack up to that. She needs to come up with a better way to describe him to her new boyfriends, or that might be the only one she ever has. Just sayin'.

And Madison, everyone thought what Madison did was sooooooooooooooo valiant. And it was, the right thing to do. However . . . the biggest shocker to me was. WHO THE HECK WAS THAT LAST GIRL HE GAVE A ROSE TO? I HAVE NEVER SEEN HER BEFORE!

Over and out, from the desert.

9 comments:

Jill said...

You are hilarious. I'm laughing my head off.
Emily is cute...and she got more bubbly at the end. She wasn't a "hot mess" when she told him either! lol. She just took forEVER to warm up. I TOTALLY agree with you though. I don't think she can let go of the past. She needs to watch Lion King ;)
I like a TON of the girls, but my fav is Chantal. Just love her for some reason!
Michelle makes me want to gag. Seriously, I can't stand much more of her obnoxiousness. WHY. WHY is there always nastiness? blah. She's a disgrace to the female race :)

Arian said...

Ahhh, thank you. Now I feel complete. :)
I happened to be watching E! News and saw Ali on there. She was commenting on what her and Roberto's thoughts were of the girls. She said that their top pick was Emily (duh!) and that they had a hard time picturing Brad with Chantal (the one that slapped him). I'm all for Emily if she can losen up. If not, I am not sure... The other girls seem kind of young for a 38 year old guy with commitment issues. Time will tell, I guess.

Ashley C said...

I enjoy your re-caps. There is so much to say after each episode. I might need to start my own re-caps because I have to vent sometimes. Here's my two cents:

I must be the only one who doesn't like Emily. Yes, she is super sweet. But... she is one of those women who will be tanning, teeth whitening, hair bleaching, getting botox and face lifts, and whatever else until she's 80. She's just too into looking perfect and that bugs. Not the kind of girl you could take outdoors, ever. She just can't relax.

Ok, I'll stop there. So much to say, so little typing space. :)

Hollyween said...

Flippin' hilarious!!

Ya know, Brad is REALLY emotionally available right now. These girls should be ecstatic that they can sit there and talk all about themselves because Brad has put them in a 'comfortable place'. And he's not going to think they're too needy or too talkative or BORING or ANYTHING!

Oh.. and you forgot to mention how Madison can take her fangs out! I was sooo relieved that they weren't permanent! Thank goodness!!

Michelle is completely crazy town. And sometimes she looks pretty and sometimes she reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where if it's bad lighting she looks horrid. ha ha ha ha

jessica said...

Love this! You never disappoint...NEVER!!! BTW. A is in Cali right now. My hands are full with chitlins. I will email details about my trip soon...luvs!

Carol said...

ok my favorite part this time was the last line - i laughed out loud - because i didn't recognize her either - i had no clue who she was.

Jeanelle said...

Brad's 38??? Seriously? Why on earth do they have all of these early 20 girls. Ridiculous. I love Emily (and I always quote in my head Taladega Nights when she's on.) They interviewed Jason Mesnick on my radio station this week and he talked about how the first person he ever talked to on the Bachelor was the story editor and how the producers phrase questions just to get you to say exactly what they want you to say (stuff we knew but it was fun to hear.)

Emily said...

linds we must have watched it together in spirit because my thoughts were almost the same!
WHO THE HECK WAS THAT LAST GIRL?????? Can they pllllleeezzz stop interviewing michelle, I can't stand listening to her!!!! The spoilers say some interesting things! Also I think Brad has a type, and I don't think Emily will be it-I think he really like brunettes!!

Gabi said...

Are you out of town? Call when you get back. I didn't watch Bachelor, but we can go for smoothies and talk healthy!

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